So according to the official website for Steak And BJ Day, the was movement started by the Romans in 269AD. However, the more likely possibility is that this movement began sometime in the last ten years and really started rolling once us millenials picked up the idea from the internets. What is Steak and Blowjob Day? Well, it’s a day that’s celebrated every year on March 14 – exactly one month after Valentine’s Day – as a celebration of men and the things they love (like steak and blow-jobs).
I love this idea and I think it’s hilarious. I realize that Valentine’s Day is sort of the day to celebrate loved ones. I also realize that, similarly to complaints against Valentine’s Day, this “holiday” could be celebrated anytime throughout the year. Why do men need a specific day to receive steak and blow-jobs?! I’ve actually written about the pros of Steak And Blow-Job day for three years now for CollegeCandy and while I’ve matured, my thoughts on this matter have basically stayed the same.
This year on Valentine’s Day my boyfriend took me out to dinner at a super nice restaurant, got flowers sent to my office and actually bought an entire bottle of wine for us at the restaurant. It was waiting for us when we got there. As it was our first Valentine’s Day together it was probably a little over the top, but we were both excited. Call me a bad girlfriend, but what I did for him was not as amazing. I made him a candy bouquet. It cost some money and definitely took some time, but it was hardly splurging on flowers. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH FLOWERS COST? A lot. I realize I could have done more for him on Valentine’s Day, but I personally don’t see the point.
It’s a big deal for women (sorry for sweeping generalizations, but it’s true) to post what they got on Facebook from their “hubbys” with the #blessed humblebrag happening all over the place. It’s what Valentine’s Day has turned into. I love Steak and Blowjob Day because I get to pamper the best guy I know without any pressure for him to return the favor. To me it’s a “Thank You” for Valentine’s Day, just a month later.
Also, for all you willing participants I concocted a recipe to make some pretty damn good steaks in the kitchen. And by concocted, I mean I texted my boyfriend to ask him for a recipe since I can’t cook. If you’re brave enough to try it out, please let me know because yay. I think it’s pretty easy, however, for dinner tonight I’m taking my dude to Texas Roadhouse. I can’t really trust myself in the kitchen. Also, helpful hint: If you’re going to participate in some fellatio or other sexy times – do it before you eat. Steak is super filling and it won’t be sexy if you have a food baby that looks like it’s ready to pop. Also, if he’s full he could fart on you. Full disclosure.
Perfect Steak Recipe:
-2 (at least) strip or rib-eye steaks (Personally, rib-eyes are more high quality but if you’re not sure talk to the guy behind the meat counter at your grocery store. They’re there to help)
-Olive or Canola Oil
-Salt & Pepper
-Other favorite seasonings
-Asparagus (or other veggie, but asparagus goes SO WELL with steak)
1. In a medium size frying pan, heat the skillet up to around medium-high heat. If the pan is too hot the steak can burn on the outside while the inside is rare. So that’s gross.
2. Drizzle some oil on both sides of the steak so that it’s covered but not, like, drenched in oil. Just a thin layer on the top is perfect. If you have a brush, use it to brush the oil onto the steaks. Then season as desired.
3. When you place the steak onto the pan you should hear a little sizzle and you’ll be good to go. For medium rare steaks cook it for around 2-2.5 minutes on each side. Obviously if you want a rarer steak cook it for less time on each side and more on each side for a more well done steak. Also, if you’re like me and super impatient remember to just flip it a few times so that it looks all nice and juicy. Try and use tongs if you have them so the juices don’t escape from piercing the steak with a knife or something.
4. Cut into one of the steaks, probably your own, to test for doneness. If you have a thermometer you can use that too. Once it’s reached the level of rare/well done that you would like remove it from the heat and cover it with tin foil so that it can “rest.” It should rest for at least five minutes. Pro tip: The steak cooks on the inside after you take it off of heat. If you’re at a restaurant and constantly getting the wrong kind of steak, order it medium rare and by the time they bring it out to you it’ll be medium etc.
5. Serve steak with your favorite veggie and enjoy!
Molly is a senior journalism/English major at a school you haven’t heard of in a state you haven’t heard of. She’s obsessed with Chandler Bing, English bulldogs, and cheese. Follow her on twitter @mollymahannah, or check out her website accordingtomolly.com.
[Lead image via Alan Poulson Photography/Shutterstock]
