12 People Holding The Pole With Their Butts On Public Transportation

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subway pole

I despise pole leaners. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? We are in a crowded train and you are leaning on the pole, blocking it from use, and everyone else has to squeeze into other unwanted crevices in order to grab onto something. It’s selfish and thoughtless and while we all do it sometimes without realizing, after a few seconds normal people realize that they were being jerks. If the train is empty then fine, poop on the seats, I don’t care. During rush hour, you cannot decide an entire pole is yours.

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way let’s talk about the butt clench leaners. This is a special group of people with asses so ripe they become gripping mechanisms. At first I thought these booty clenchers were mere accidents. They backed into the pole without realizing and then this unfortunateness happened. Then I started to think about it, nope, these guys are leaners they just have a different technique is all. It’s not as if they’re holding onto anything else for stability. SMH. I don’t understand how a cold bar between your buttcheeks doesn’t set off any alarms in the brain but it doesn’t. It doesn’t for so many people. It’s tragic really, constantly falling victim to people’s Snapchats and Instagram accounts. Please, use apple bottom for something else. It deserves better than this. Those poles are so yucky. They have INFLUENZA and E. COLI all over them, I am 100% sure. Save thy booty.

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