The 9 Emotions You Experience After Graduating


Graduating college is a major accomplishment. Pat yourself on the back. You did it, bb! Now comes the hard part. College was hard, yes. But being an adult is forever. You’ll never not be a grownup now. Let that sink in. Don’t worry, you get to eat ice cream for dinner and literally do whatever the hell you want. That’s a bonus. Graduating often marks a major transition in our lives and that means there will be some growing pains. They happen and they come on strong. Don’t worry we all go through this and we all come out on the other side. Brace yourself, these are the 9 emotions you experience post-graduation.



Yaaaaaaas. You’ve graduated. Yaaaaaaaas. Say goodbye to all those collegiate basics. I don’t even curr what I got on those finals. Y’all can kiss my whole asshole goodbye.


I can’t believe it! Little old me has a degree? Look at it. It says I put up with this institutional bullshit for 4 whole years. Want to know if I am smart? I got proof. Right here. You can’t touch this. I did it. I earned it. I earnedededed it. ME. I did this. Thanks, mom (but I did it).


Hold up? Where my job at? How come I sent out like, 400 resumes and I haven’t heard a peep out of anyone? Where is my 401K and $15 co-pay? Where is my job? I did the things. I did THE things that you do to get a job!


Oh. So it doesn’t work that way anymore? It wasn’t supposed to be like this.


It’s just that my broke ass can’t stand to live with my parents anymore and I am so exhausted of working retail and trying to find a job and I don’t even live in the same state as my best friends anymore and it feels like there is no foreseeable end to all of this and I just want a . . . hug.


Remember that one time Sheila got wasted at that party and thought the bath tub was a ferris wheel? Remember that time Jenny got catfished? Remember when we used to all live on the same floor and stay up all night watching Netflix and chatting? I miss the good times. Maybe I should go to grad school?


No! Grad school would be a mistake. I can’t just keep postponing adulthood. You do the work and then you get the things! I will send out resumes! I will save money! I will be diligent! I didn’t come this far to give up.

Cautious Optimism

A call back? An interview? Still not hired but it’s a start. I still want to shoot myself in the face but it’s a start. Sheila got a job and she once got so drunk she thought the bath tub was a ferris wheel, so I definitely can get a job. I can get a job.


Fine. I get it. It’s not supposed to be easy. If things were easy then I wouldn’t appreciate them. If things were easy then no one would ever learn anything. It’s called character building. It’s called life. It really isn’t so bad. After all when I come to think of it, I am actually pretty lucky, right? My parents are letting me stay with them rent free. I just got a D-E-G-R-E-E and there are so many people who can’t even get “crappy” retail jobs. There’s a roof over my head, people who care about me and I am doing everything I can do. I am on the right track. What more can I do? What more can I really ask for? I’ll get that job and when I do it will be the greatest gift I’ve ever given to myself.

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