The Virgin Diaries: “Head by Homecoming” is the New “Ring By Spring”

I’ve been told that in college is when meet the women who are supposed to be your bridesmaids. I’ve also been told me I would find my husband in college and that was clearly a lie, but that’s another story for another column. Anyway, I’ve made friends with the most insane women in the world in school, and I’m not sure I want them having anything to do with my wedding.

It was a normal three way conversation (which I’ve never been a fan of might I add) about nothing, per usual, when the topic of sex came up, again per usual. They made it a point to let me know that I am not “trying” to meet guys and make advances in my love — which in this case I guess is synonymous with sexual — life, so they were gonna fix it. Before I could defend myself one said, “You need to meet a guy and get head before homecoming, no exceptions,” and the other agreed.

Reaction #1: Bish whet?

Reaction #2: Oh, hell no.

Reaction #3: Hmm….

Reaction #4: Who do you think you are?

Reaction #5: Well, I’m not saying no, but I’m not saying yes either.

By no means was I taking their little challenge seriously, but the next night when I was talking to a guy at a bar I couldn’t help but wonder if I could flirt my way into getting some satisfaction. And that same thought crossed my mind every time I spoke to anyone of the male kind. I’m not saying I was thirsty, but someone could’ve definitely handed me a glass of water.

A few weeks after this challenge was dropped on my head, I decided not to entertain it any longer. I’m not opposed to casual hookups in theory, but I’m not that girl. If I was I wouldn’t be a virgin now. For now I’m keeping the pace I’m at. But if my some way in hell this quest is fulfilled…I ain’t mad at it.

  • 10614935101348454