15 Easy Ways to Guarantee You Have Someone to Drunk Text This Valentine's Day

The most dreaded day of the year for single ladies is quickly approaching. Luckily, you don’t have to be all alone eating overpriced chocolates this Valentine’s Day! Just try one of these simple ways to find the man of your dreams (or nightmares…beggars can’t be choosers, amiright?) by February 14.

1. Message all your former hook-ups on Facebook. One of them is bound to be down for a second take.

2. Create profiles on every dating site you can find. eHarmony has a free communication weekend or something, right?

3. Stand outside your crush’s window with your iPod speakers raised over your head, Say Anything-style.

4. Head to the club and convince a guy that you’re the daughter of one of the Koch brothers.

5. Order a pizza and hit on the delivery guy. If your flirting fails, at least you have a pizza.

6. Go to Starbucks, pretend to read a book, and wink at any guy who comes through the door.

7. Take your dog for a walk and repeatedly pass bars you know young professionals frequent for happy hour. If you don’t have a dog, borrow one.

8. Post a picture of your crush on Instagram for #MCM.

9. Publicly declare your love for that cutie from Statistics by standing on a table in the dining hall during peak hours.

10. Buy a guy a beer and seductively say, “I swear it’s not roofied,” as you hand it to him.

11. Stalk your favorite celebrity until they realize they’re in love with you.

12. Trip and fall whenever a guy is passing you so they can be chivalrous and help you up.

13. Auction yourself off to the highest bidder at the bar on Thirsty Thursday, preferably pretty late in the night.

14. Use hypnosis.

15. There’s always Tinder.

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