Social media is a wonderful thing….except for when it’s not.
Whether it’s reminding you that everyone you know is engaged/married/popping babies or cluing you into the fact that some people still think it’s cute to post Sex And The City quotes, social media is sort of where the annoying habits or annoying people come out to play.
Instagram, for example. It has the power to be an amazing tool and the fact that you can quickly scroll past the stuff you don’t like (or simply unfollow the people who post them) is pretty sweet. Still, annoying behavior is annoying behavior – and today we’re calling it out.
1. The gym rats.
I don’t care that you beat your “PR” at your 5 am workout this morning (mostly because I don’t know what a “PR” is but also because 5 am is for sleeping.) I do not want to see 11,000 pictures of your sneakers. I certainly don’t want to hear your ramblings about “clean eating” because my Flamin’ Hot cheetos and I happen to be quite happy together. Also, like what percentage of your gym visits are spent posing in front of the mirror until you get the perfect shot?
2. The uber-couples.
If you’re posting a picture of your guy every single Monday with the caption #MCM #LoveYouForever #MyLove #LoveYouSoMuch, you need GTFO. Same goes for people who post shots of their ladies every Wednesday for #WCW, Love is beautiful and all but being cheesy is never cute.
3. The hustler.
You know – the people who post screenshots of quotes like ” the dream comes free, the hustle is sold separately” every single day. Ugh. Okay, first of all, no one asked for your advice. Secondly, we all work just as hard at our miserable 9-5 jobs as most of you do. You can only post this stuff if you’re like, ridiculously successful (most people who post these things are not.) Finally, why don’t you spend less time posting shit about how important it is to “hustle” and more time actually, you know, working?
4. The hashtag abuser.
Okay, complete sentences are NOT hashtag-worthy. Sorry. No. It’s one thing if you throw in one of those obnoxiously long hashtags every so often to mock the whole thing, but if every photo you post has a caption like #wehavebeenbestfriendssinceweweretwo #loveherlikethesisterineverhad #myfriendsarebetterthanyours #rememberwhenwefirstmetontheswingsinpreschoolthatwasthebestdayever, you should probably stop. Social media lesson: Hashtags are metadata tags, no a newfangled way to punctuate sentences. Maybe these are only annoying to people who work in digital media?
5. The compliment fishers.
I have no problem with those girls who post completely stunning selfies which are clearly the results of long selfie-taking sessions during which they take 87 photos from different angles, only to filter them to the next planet. Ain’t no shame in the game. What makes this behavior annoying, though, is when she throws a caption along the lines of “bad hair day” or “ugh why is my smile so awkward?” or “I woke up like this #hotmess.” No, girl. You’re a regulation hottie. Own it.
[Lead image via]
