Playing 'The Game': Beware the Pickup Artist

In case you haven’t heard of it, “pick up artistry” is the term given to the community dedicated to “finding, attracting and seducing sexual partners.” A Pick Up Artist, or PUA, operates on the school of thought that women seek dominant, powerful and successful men.
Believe or not, there is a science operating behind it, one that convinces men that there is a formula to be followed for picking up women— essentially perceiving them as prey. Although it is not a new concept, it gained especial popularity with the publication of Neil Strauss’s “The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists.”
Although this approach is riddled with different techniques and strategies, there are some popular methods guys who believe in this absurd trash stuff use that you should be aware of.


A “neg” is a backhanded compliment, or a subtle insult, aimed at woman which takes a dig at her self confidence. The theory behind it is that by tapping into the woman’s insecurity, he shakes up her confidence, causing confusion and, hopefully, intrigue– which then results in the woman wanting to seek the approval of the man doing the “negging.” This is especially popular to use on traditionally attractive women who are used to getting hit on and treated like princesses.
(Obviously this, along with all these other ideas, is a conniving calculation of a woman’s seemingly over-inflated self worth to be used strategically.Kind of like reverse psychology.)

Group Theory

The Group Theory proposes that “hot” women rarely go out alone, so in order to get an “in” with them, and access the “target,” you have to talk to the friends before her. The idea is that doing so will confuse the girl you’re really after because she is the one that is used to being hit on.


The False Time Constraint is the conversation opener in which a guy mentions he can only stay for a minute, in hopes of instilling anxiety immediately regarding his departure. The idea is that if you make her nervous that you are about to leave, she is going to try to get you to stay.


Kino refers to “casual touching,” and is meant to touch or make physical contact with her subtly at some point in conversation in a non confrontational or sexual way, to ease her into feeling comfortable around them (and the idea of being intimate with them) without being too forward.


Stands for neuro linguistic programming and is when you influence one’s subconscious level by using gestures that have sexual undertones. It’s a reach, but the thought behind it is that he basically sends her subliminal messages, and she thinks about him sexually on a  subconscious level.

IOIs or “Indicators of Interest”

They are subtle signs from her that are giving him the “go-ahead.” According to the book, a guy is supposed to get three before he can assume he has reached the “qualifying phase”– where she would even consider leaving with him. Examples are touching her hair while talking, grooming herself casually, or breaking eye contact with and looking down before back again.

Drinks not dinner.

If a guy wants to set up a date with you, it is advised that he asks you to go out for drinks, not dinner. Drinks are less of a commitment than dinner is, and dinner means a table between you which is a physical barrier he doesn’t want or need.
The principles of being a pickup artist operate on the idea that the goal is to remove, or at the very least destabilize, the woman’s power.
As Strauss says, “Women are born with a thing called intuition and it’s their best defense against these guys.”

55 Thoughts You Have While Going Down On A Guy
55 Thoughts You Have While Going Down On A Guy
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