Being single is awesome most of the time. Valentine’s Day…well, it’s not one of those days.
There are definitely perks to being single on February 14 – you don’t have to worry about buying your s/o a gift, there’s no stressing over dinner reservations, and all of your single friends are practically guaranteed to be free for a girls’ night. But if you act like you’re not slightly jealous whatsoever of the couples walking around holding hands and being all lovey-dovey, you’re a liar and can’t be trusted.
While you’re totally free to weep as Jack Dawson disappears into the ocean any day of the year, Valentine’s Day is your free pass to act a little – dare I say it – crazy. What’s normally not socially acceptable becomes totally okay for these 24 hours – use them wisely. Here’s a few of my favorite ways to capitalize on being alone for Valentine’s Day.
1. Sending flowers to your office with a note signed “Love, Your Secret Admirer.” Who could it be?
2. Finishing off your entire pint of Ben and Jerry’s…then splitting a second flavor with a fellow single lady.
3. Sobbing while watching Titanic for the 549th time.
4. Belting out “Someone Like You” (or anything by Adele) at karaoke and giving zero f*cks about being on key.
5. Confessing your love to every guy you match with on Tinder.
6. Spending entirely too much money on a pair of booties you’ve been eyeing for weeks.
7. Skipping the gym.
8. Snuggling with one of those creepy Boyfriend Pillows.
9. Downing a bottle of wine or three.
10. Texting your ex from a friends phone just because you kind of miss him.
11. Calling that booty call you swore you’d delete from your phone months ago.
12. Having a Snapchat story that’s over 100 seconds long and contains far too many selfies at the bar.
13. Refusing to put on a bra until it’s February 15.
14. Lying to your coworkers about your extravagant V-day plans with a guy you’ve been in love with since high school.
15. Picking out names for your future collection of cats.
16. Filling out fake OKCupid profiles purely for entertainment purposes.
17. Binge watching all 12 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy.
18. Coming up with a list of potential boyfriends, the top candidate being the guy who just delivered pizza.
19. Faking an interest in buying a pet and playing with all the puppies at the store.
20. Memorizing the entire dance to “Single Ladies” and filming it for YouTube.
21. Telling all the guys at the bar that your boyfriend, Zayn Malik, is on a business trip this week.
22. Facebook stalking your exes, all the way back to the kid you kissed at recess in first grade.
23. Casually turning all of the Valentine’s Day merchandise in Target around so it’s not a red and pink aisle.
24. Begging your roommate to tell you that you’re pretty.
25. Posting Marilyn Monroe quotes on Twitter.