You Can Mail Someone The IRL Eggplant Emoji Thanks To This Stupid Startup

Does this look familiar?


Chances are, you’ve used the eggplant emoji on numerous occasions- and no, not because you’re going to make eggplant parm. The phallic-shaped vegetable is strangely sexual and often used mid sext when you want to bone.

Yet now, thanks to this weird AF startup, you can send an actual eggplant to your frenemy, or lover…or whoever for about $10 with free shipping worldwide. Eggplant Mail guarantees to “mail an anonymous eggplant, with your personal message, anywhere in the world.” So if for whatever reason you’ve always wanted to do this, now you can. DREAMS REALLY DO COME TRUE.

Thankfully, the people behind this have a soul and will ship it anonymously so no one knows you’re the a**hole who spent $9.99 for an eggplant in a box.

Their tag line is “100% Phallic. 100% Anonymous. 100% Disturbing.” Yet I’m disturbed that something like this even exists TBH. You can’t make this sh*t up. Personally, I was a bigger fan of sending a bag of dicks via snail mail, but I digress. Life’s weird.

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