Madie Cardon is a 16-year-old high schooler who is making the world realize that some things never change — namely relationship issues.
The teen from Mapleton, Utah is going viral after she found her diary this past week. Now 16, Cardon took to Twitter with an unrequited love story that happened when she was just 7-years-old.
The story follows Riley, Cardon’s crush, chasing some chick named Jessica around the playground — in front of her face. Rude.
“She is such a player!” Cardon wrote in hot pink pen. “She hugs at least five boys every day! I am so mad at her.” Wow Jessica, go easy. Jesus.
Immediately Cardon came up with a brilliant revenge plan: “I think I will tell Riley her secret. She wears pull ups! After he finds out he won’t like her anymore.” Solid idea, except if I learned anything in college, it’s that taking a dude away from a girl who’s willing to distribute that many hugs is really difficult.
Regardless of her feelings towards Jessica, Cardon went out on a limb and made Riley a valentine.
“Before Riley got to school I put it in his desk. When he got to school he looked in his desk he found my box. I wrote anonymous on it so he wouldn’t know it was from me. Right when he looked at it [he threw] it away. I am still crying. I have depression.”
Girl, I have been there. Especially at the kicker of this story: that Riley did in fact have a thing for Jessica. “I am done with boys. I want to kill all of them.”
Well I have definitely been there. Thank you Madie, your 7-year-old self is a real hero.
[H/T: Refinery29]