Woman Compares Taylor Swift’s Private Bits to a Sandwich, the Internet Loses It



The internet is a a strange, strange place. I mean, when you have enough people screaming into the void, you’re bound to hear some weird things. Of course, every once in a while, there’s one scream that’s louder and more bizarre than any others, so loud that you can’t help but pay attention.

This latest example of this comes to us from Jennifer Mayers, a self-described “wife, mother, Christian,” who decided it was a good idea to post a picture of two ham sandwiches with the caption: “The reason I preach #Christianity. My daughters represent the right. Taylor Swift‘s vagina represents the left.”

The reason I preach #Christianity. My daughters represent the right. Taylor Swift's vagina represents the left. pic.twitter.com/4blQ5FrTJo

— Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 16, 2016

There are just so many questions. Too many questions. Perhaps, the most pressing is: what the f–ck?! From the picture, I guess we’re meant to infer that Taylor Swift’s lady business is an overused mess, while this woman’s daughters’ va-jay-jays are nice and small and neat because Jesus.

In order to eliminate any confusion, Mayers has kindly decoded it for us:

It was meant to be a visual aid to describe Taylor's apparent promiscuity and her lack of self control when it comes to men. She needs help.

— Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 7, 2016

Since it was first posted on June 15, the tweet has been retweeted over a thousand times. And, unsurprisingly, the reaction from other users has ranged from horrified—

HOLY SHIT NOOOOOOOOOOO https://t.co/Y9D1e7e8tn

— eve peyser (@evepeyser) July 6, 2016

— to impromptu sex ed lesson—

.@southern_mayers that's not how vaginas work, just fyi.

— Ella Dawson (@brosandprose) July 6, 2016

— to hunger.

@brosandprose @southern_mayers It's just reminding me I haven't had lunch.

— (((Lichtenstein))) (@ABLichtenstein) July 6, 2016

This isn’t the first time that this Mayers has made such inflammatory posts. Some have suggested that the account is meant to be satire or it’s just a troll having a laugh, but she’s been consistently posting things like this for a while. In some of her most recent tweets, she’s called presidential candidate Hillary Clinton “Satan” and the son of Alton Sterling, the man who was murdered by police, “thug trash.”

Of course, there are some that have decided to have some fun with Mayers’ ramblings. Currently, the hashtag “” is trending: 

I was mad at the lady for saying Taylor Swift has a ham sandwich vagina but #IfMyVaginaWereASandwich is a gift

— Brian J. White (@talkwordy) July 6, 2016

I just spent 10 minutes on Google considering which sandwich image best represents my vulva. Twitter is weird. #IfMyVaginaWereASandwich

— Imperator Furiaura (@aurabeth) July 6, 2016

Yes. Twitter is weird.

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