Taylor Swift penned an essay for Elle of 30 life lessons she’s learned before she turns 30 later this year. Swift covers everything from Instagram, Kim Kardashian, her fear of touring again and more personal topics like her mother’s cancer.
Read the 10 biggest bombshells and takeaways from Swift’s Elle essay here.
How Swift really felt after Kim Kardashian called her a snake.
“A few years ago, someone started an online hate campaign by calling me a snake on the internet. The fact that so many people jumped on board with it led me to feeling lower than I’ve ever felt in my life, but I can’t tell you how hard I had to keep from laughing every time my 63-foot inflatable cobra named Karyn appeared onstage in front of 60,000 screaming fans. It’s the Stadium Tour equivalent of responding to a troll’s hateful Instagram comment with “lol.” It would be nice if we could get an apology from people who bully us, but maybe all I’ll ever get is the satisfaction of knowing I could survive it, and thrive in spite of it.”
Swift has her Instagram comments turned off for a good reason.
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Ahead of her 30th birthday, Taylor Swift is sharing 30 things she learned before turning 30. “I’ve come to a realization that I need to be able to forgive myself for making the wrong choice, trusting the wrong person, or figuratively falling on my face in front of everyone,” she writes. “Step into the daylight and let it go.” Link in bio for the full essay penned by ELLE’s April cover star. ELLE April 2019: Editor-in-chief: @ninagarcia Creative director: #stephengan Cover star: @taylorswift Photographer: @benhassett Stylist: @paulcavaco Wearing: @burberry Hair: @sergenormant Makeup: @francelledaly, @lovecraftbeauty Nails: @DeniseBourne37, @deborahlippmann Producer: Kristen Terry, @roscoproduction
“Social media can be great, but it can also inundate your brain with images of what you aren’t, how you’re failing, or who is in a cooler locale than you at any given moment. One thing I do to lessen this weird insecurity laser beam is to turn off comments. Yes, I keep comments off on my posts. That way, I’m showing my friends and fans updates on my life, but I’m training my brain to not need the validation of someone telling me I look 🔥🔥🔥. I’m also blocking out anyone who might feel the need to tell me to “go die in a hole ho” while I’m having my coffee at nine in the morning. I think it’s healthy for your self-esteem to need less internet praise to appease it, especially when three comments down you could unwittingly see someone telling you that you look like a weasel that got hit by a truck and stitched back together by a drunk taxidermist. An actual comment I received once.”
The Manchester Bombing at Ariana Grande’s concert scared Swift about touring again.
“After the Manchester Arena bombing and the Vegas concert shooting, I was completely terrified to go on tour this time because I didn’t know how we were going to keep 3 million fans safe over seven months. There was a tremendous amount of planning, expense, and effort put into keeping my fans safe. My fear of violence has continued into my personal life. ”
Swift revealed that her dad used to have cancer and that her mom’s cancer is back.
“I’ve had to learn how to handle serious illness in my family. Both of my parents have had cancer, and my mom is now fighting her battle with it again. It’s taught me that there are real problems and then there’s everything else. My mom’s cancer is a real problem. I used to be so anxious about daily ups and downs. I give all of my worry, stress, and prayers to real problems now.”
Swift is fearful of stalkers breaking into her home.
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#TaylorSwift on accepting her body: “I worked hard to retrain my brain that a little extra weight means curves, shinier hair, and more energy. I think a lot of us push the boundaries of dieting, but taking it too far can be really dangerous. There is no quick fix. I work on accepting my body every day.” Link in bio to read 30 things Taylor learned before turning 30. ELLE April 2019: Editor-in-chief: @ninagarcia Creative director: #stephengan Cover star: @taylorswift Photographer: @benhassett Stylist: @paulcavaco Wearing: @gucci Hair: @sergenormant Makeup: @francelledaly, @lovecraftbeauty Nails: @denisebourne37, @deborahlippmann Producer: Kristen Terry, @roscoproduction
“I carry QuikClot army grade bandage dressing, which is for gunshot or stab wounds. Websites and tabloids have taken it upon themselves to post every home address I’ve ever had online. You get enough stalkers trying to break into your house and you kind of start prepping for bad things. Every day I try to remind myself of the good in the world, the love I’ve witnessed and the faith I have in humanity. We have to live bravely in order to truly feel alive, and that means not being ruled by our greatest fears.”
How Swift learned to accept her body.
“I learned to stop hating every ounce of fat on my body. I worked hard to retrain my brain that a little extra weight means curves, shinier hair, and more energy. I think a lot of us push the boundaries of dieting, but taking it too far can be really dangerous. There is no quick fix. I work on accepting my body every day.”
When Swift cuts negative people out of her life she blocked their number.
“You only have so much room in your life and so much energy to give to those in it. Be discerning. If someone in your life is hurting you, draining you, or causing you pain in a way that feels unresolvable, blocking their number isn’t cruel. It’s just a simple setting on your phone that will eliminate drama if you so choose to use it.”
Swift loves how outspoken actress Jameela Jamil is about women issues.
“I’ve learned that society is constantly sending very loud messages to women that exhibiting the physical signs of aging is the worst thing that can happen to us. These messages tell women that we aren’t allowed to age. It’s an impossible standard to meet, and I’ve been loving how outspoken Jameela Jamil has been on this subject. Reading her words feels like hearing a voice of reason amongst all these loud messages out there telling women we’re supposed to defy gravity, time, and everything natural in order to achieve this bizarre goal of everlasting youth that isn’t even remotely required of men.”
Swift always believes sexual assault victims.
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“Invoking racism and provoking fear through thinly veiled messaging is not what I want from our leaders, and I realized that it actually is my responsibility to use my influence against that disgusting rhetoric,” #TaylorSwift writes for ELLE’s April issue. “I’m going to do more to help. We have a big race coming up next year.” Link in bio to read the full essay. ELLE April 2019: Editor-in-chief: @ninagarcia Cover star: @taylorswift Photographer: @benhassett Stylist: @paulcavaco Wearing: @gucci Hair: @sergenormant Makeup: @francelledaly, @lovecraftbeauty Nails: @DeniseBourne37, @deborahlippmann Producer: Kristen Terry, @roscoproduction
“It’s my opinion that in cases of sexual assault, I believe the victim. Coming forward is an agonizing thing to go through. I know because my sexual assault trial was a demoralizing, awful experience. I believe victims because I know firsthand about the shame and stigma that comes with raising your hand and saying “This happened to me.” It’s something no one would choose for themselves. We speak up because we have to, and out of fear that it could happen to someone else if we don’t.”
Swift paraded her girl squad so much because of her childhood insecurities.
“Realizing childhood scars and working on rectifying them. For example, never being popular as a kid was always an insecurity for me. Even as an adult, I still have recurring flashbacks of sitting at lunch tables alone or hiding in a bathroom stall, or trying to make a new friend and being laughed at. In my twenties I found myself surrounded by girls who wanted to be my friend. So I shouted it from the rooftops, posted pictures, and celebrated my newfound acceptance into a sisterhood, without realizing that other people might still feel the way I did when I felt so alone. It’s important to address our long-standing issues before we turn into the living embodiment of them”