Let it be noted that the day “catfish” was added to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, was the day we lost faith in the English language. Jargon is an ordinary part of communication, but commonality and frequency of use are not excuses for the powers at be to continue trolling the general population by validating these ridiculous terms as legitimate fixtures in language.
We’re assuming that this silly little trend isn’t going to end anytime soon and that Merriam-Webster will be looking for new ridiculous words to add soon, so we’ve gone ahead and thought of some for them. But, all jokes aside we really hope that day never comes.
Surfbort– v. a sexual action involving a bathtub filled halfway with water, as prescribed by Beyonce
“Have you tried surborting yet? I got water all over the floor!”
Cake– n. a large derriere
“I heard eating fries and doing squats gives you major cake.”
Troll– v. to deliberately convey ideas to aggravate others for amusement
“I swear administration keeps raising tuition to troll us.”
Thot– n. an acronym for “that hoe over there;” a term used to identify a woman who is sexually promiscuous
“Yes, sleeping with the half of the football team does make you a thot.”
Bawse– n. a variation of the word “boss;” a person who is incredibly successful and well respected in their career and personal lives
“Only bawses sit on $25 million at 25.”
Bye, Felicia– a phrase that originated from the the classic movie Friday staring Chris Tucker and Ice Cube, used to dismiss someone who is incredibly annoying or stupid
“Africa is the largest country in the world!”
“Bye, Felicia.”
Bae– n. an affectionate term for a lover; a shortened version of “babe;” often catches their lover slipping
“Chilling with bae.”
Or Nah– a phrase indicating the negative option of a proposition or question, usually said after smacking the lips and a long pause
“Can I borrow your car for like three days….or nah?”
