Shutterstock
So you’ve received this in a text, email, or DM. You’re probably already extremely bored and will most likely pretend to read this, there is the first part where you went wrong. For men, life can be a lot more simple than for a woman. I am not here to undermine how hard to work or belittle your presence but most men have toxic masculinity stored within their brains. Whether it makes you think twice about saying something or it controls how you act there is something in their imprinted on you by society that makes you tailor yourself.
Things You Do That Show You Don’t Understand
Shutterstock
Throughout daily life, there are many things that show how much men do not understand their actions and how they impact women. This is coming from many first-hand experiences of creepy or uncomfortable encounters with men. When you approach a woman in public who is alone. It might seem like an innocent conversation or a way to meet someone new but it really is not okay. Reverse the roles and think about it from a woman’s perspective. A random man you don’t know is coming up to you. In most situations, this can seem very aggressive. If you are sitting next to a woman on a late train home, leave her alone. It is not time to make a move or get to know her. She is most likely already uncomfortable to be taking the train home alone at night.
Work environments aren’t necessarily the best place to look for someone to date. It might have been easier for you to get a job and move up in the workplace but for me, I’m here to prove I am worth my work. Any comments about dating, getting to know someone better outside of work, or being more than friends are completely inappropriate and very unnecessary. Work is for work and outside of work is for outside of work. If things happen organically or continue to move forward on both sides then that is fine, but when it comes to convincing someone they should go out with you just stop there. Not only does it make a very uncomfortable situation it makes for a toxic work environment. If a woman says no, many men take it in a very bad way.
If it’s a negative response then its a no. Just because it wasn’t a straight-up no doesn’t mean there is room for a yes. If you try to make plans with a woman and she says she is busy or overloaded with work instead of no thank you, it doesn’t mean she can be convinced into spending a few off-work hours with you, it means she’s telling you the truth. Overall, if you feel like you have to do any convincing then just stop right there.
Now that you’ve read this, understand that I just want to help. It can be very complicated to understand someone who you are nothing like but this is a great start.
