Ever heard of faking it?
Crazy and a little awkward, but also very true.
I've started hooking up with a guy who seems great in every way but one -- he's a little selfish in the bedroom. He gets his every time, whether it's through oral or old fashioned sex, and leaves me to fend for myself.
So you've seen this guy a few times, but you just can't figure out what he really think about you. Does he see you as an occasional hookup buddy or does he really want to get to know you and possibly date you? I think the easiest answer comes in the amount of effort he puts into seeing you.
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Now, don’t get me wrong. There was a 6-month period in there where I did nothing but play Guiter Hero. All the time. Every day. One time in a towel immediately upon stepping out of the shower. (Seriously.) I was addicted and loved the pleasure I felt when I finally mastered Heart’s Barracuda on medium. But it didn’t make my toes curl. Or my neck tingle. Or my eyes to roll back in my head. Or…give me an orgasm.
Cue two naked couples, both in sexual scenarios.Couple 1 attacks each other like wild animals, both racing to the big O. Couple 2 takes their time, pleasing each other in various kama sutra-like positions, aiming to prolong the act of sex by channeling sexual energy and increasing intimacy, letting go of all reservations and connecting to their sexual experience spiritually before engaging in the physical.
In the past six months, I've had sex. I've been laid. I f*cked. However, it's been a long time since I've made love, and I kind of miss it. Some people might argue that there's no difference - physically, they are the same. But emotionally, passionately, and mentally, the two deeds are very different.
In a utopian world, we'd never have to ask for anything, ever. The cosmos would see to it that all our needs were met without us having to put in any effort into it. Alas, in the real world, it doesn't work that way. If you want something, be it a raise at work or an extension on an assignment, you have to assert yourself. But that becomes especially harrowing when sex is involved.
I'm just going to get to the meat of it. My boyfriend and I were having sex, and I like to be a little vocal when I get there, you know, let him know I appreciate his handy work. Well, this time I got to that place like I have never been there before, and I guess I was more vocal than usual. He stops everything that he is doing, grabs his clothes and leaves.
I have spent 8 years (not continuously) with my mouth between a dude's legs, and while I finally know that I'm good at it (one fine young man - whose name I do not know - exclaimed, "Wow! That was good!"), I still don't love all the work is involved.