Scandal is the perfect show because it makes you realize that your not-boyfriend isn’t actually the worst — that specific honor goes directly to President Fitz, who brings douchey alpha male to a whole ‘nother level. Like most Shonda shows, it’s the perfect blend of intrigue, romance, and you guessed it… scandal. Whether you’re Team Olivia because you respect her white hat game, or you’re rooting for Mellie because no one drops a one-liner quite like that southern belle, it’s full of heroines who are straight killing it. To prepare for tonight, there are certain steps you should take to ensure that you enjoy the show in all its glory. Here are 13 ways to handle the premiere.
1. Find a safe place to watch. Trust no one.
2. All white everything.
3. Suit up, gladiators.
4. Eschew wine bottles for boxes. Take down all the red in the world in a single sitting.
5. Your outfit should cost at least a million dollars, minimum.
6. Give your not-boyfriend’s face a special surprise.
7. Invest in Olivia’s wine glasses, described as, “delicate, classy, and sexy!”
8. Yell “It’s handled!” into your phone at volume in a v. public place at least a dozen times.
9. Invite your friends over to watch with you. Throw a couple frenemies into the mix for fun.
10. Do a murder.
11. Perfect your bitchface. Practice your side eye.
12. Share longing glances with your boy toy, in the vein of The Hills (only more real).
13. Drink anytime Scott Foley is shirtless. You’re welcome.
