[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal, and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupididty of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself of the stress that idiots, wrong meal orders, lack of cell phone ettiquette and cheese flavored products (that don’t even contain any freaking cheese!) induce. So, in an attempt to avoid an ulcer or an unfortuante road rage incident, I vent to you, dear reader. Please feel free to join in and comment about anything–really, anything–that pissed. you. off. this week. Let it all hang out. I feel you.]

Hanson.

You guys were the opening act to my young and turbulent love life. Zac, you and I shared something so special (which you didn’t know about, but poor Robbie who sat next to me in second grade sure as hell did—my Mmm Bopping skills were not as advanced as yours, unfortunately.) You guys pretty much paved the way for one of my most important imaginary relationships with Lance, JC and Justin (obv) and I eliminated the need for my Mom’s Laura Ashley wallpaper using only creepy pictures of the three of you looking girlishly innocent (um, except for you Isaac; sorry you had to go through puberty in the midst of your stardom). Surely you all knew how important it was to uphold your fine musical talent and the pride you all brought to Tulsa, right? WRONG! A quick little ‘where they are now’: Taylor is married (has been since he was 19!) with three kids and expecting numero cuatro. My beloved Zac is also wifed up and became a Daddy last May . Isaac, ironically now the hottest by far, is also married, with children. While I am super upset that they haven’t maintained their pop idol status and never named a song after me (but managed to get around to Madeline and Lucy!), the boys are out doing good in the world nowadays; their Walk tour is to raise awareness about HIV/Aids and poverty in Africa so yes, Hanson you still make my heart melt (suck it JoBros!). Read More »

Let’s get one thing straight; I am absolutely obsessed with Disney movies. But as much as I love watching them, the princesses walking around those movies always manage to make me feel terrible about my love life. They create unrealistic expectations about love and relationships all while maintaining a search for ‘happily ever after’.

So how does one attain this happily ever after? According to a Disney princess, by finding love! And how does one find love? With a song and dance, of course!

Gone are the days where meaningful conversation and actual chemistry are needed for a relationship, Disney princesses show that chiseled features and a great singing voice are all a girl really needs. Beauty and the Beast seems to be one exception as the Beast definitely ain’t no looker but Belle likes him anyway. The only downside to this love affair is that the Beast is holding Belle captive in order to make her fall in love with him so he can turn handsome again.

Ariel, in The Little Mermaid, has yet to speak to her man before claiming her love for him. She defies her father, runs away from home, and makes a deal with an evil sorceress to give up her voice, all in hopes of meeting this guy. But lo and behold, Ariel and the prince do meet and by the end of the movie they have fallen in love and are ready to live happily ever after. Maybe it was all the stimulating conversation the two had together that attracted him to her. Or the great pair of legs she traded her voice for. Read More »

This weekend I met a guy. He is cute, funny, and 6’1″ – we exchanged numbers, and things were looking good.

Then at the end of the night as I was falling asleep, my phone chirped to inform me of a new text, from my new guy, “Great 2 meet u.”

Damn. And he had so much potential.

I know, I know, it is a sweet thing to say, but my problem is not with what he said, its how. I am the first to admit that I being extremely judgmental, but as an English major and someone who thoroughly enjoys words, I really hate to see them butchered.

Yeah, I’ve had people rationalize this texting style as faster, easier, whatever, but to substitute a single letter or a number for a word completely peeves me. Every time I see ‘4‘ in place of the word ‘for‘ or ‘c‘ instead of ‘see‘ or ‘2morrow‘ where there should be a ‘tomorrow‘ I cringe, I think of a junior high student, IQ points are lost, and a person suddenly seems extremely lazy- is it really that much harder to just type the extra two or three letters?? (The answer is no.) Read More »

I’m tired of talking to my friends about this ONE guy who has been haunting my love life, or lack thereof, since the fall. I’m sick of pretending like I don’t care when I talk to him, too. The fact of the matter, Travis, is this: Even my PARENTS know all about you and the sort of emotional mud you’ve been dragging me through. I see pictures of you and cringe. It’s time you received an open letter. And for once, I’m gonna go ahead and NOT care if your cute little girlfriend, who is, by default, an idiot, reads this.

Dear Travis,

I respect the fact that you refuse to cheat on your girlfriend of three years. You are a very noble man. In fact, I respect you for doing all that you can to avoid being in the same room as me these days. You and I both know that it’d be easier to get American troops out of Iraq than it would be to get your tongue out of my mouth if we were ever to, tragically, be left alone together.

I respect your ability to use your mind and step outside of this situation so that you can ascertain its importance in the long run. You have an impressive ability to weigh out your options, Travis. You should be a stock broker.

The only problem? Well, you’re a snakey asshole. Here’s what I DON’T respect about you: Read More »

Firstly, yes, this issue warrants more than one part!

I love romance novels. It’s not the easiest thing to admit because the genre has such an ugly stigma attached to it. Romance novel aficionados are supposed to live alone and own too many cats and collect Precious Memories figurines. Or, worse, people think that fans of the genre have no love life of their own and are living vicariously through the amply chested heroines that populate these novels. More learned opponents even go so far as to claim that romance novels are overly simplistic, poorly written and, yes, anti-feminist.

All of this couldn’t be more wrong. These ideas are all products of a society that likes to privilege what they see as “high” culture–literary novels, foreign films, classical music over lowly romance novels, horror movies and country music. There is the implication that if you like the one, you are smart and if you are a fan of the other, then you are stupid. It’s condescending and insulting. Just like with any other genre of entertainment, fans of romance are varied and complex. Read More »

Yes, I’m a workaholic.

“Do you ever just chill out?” A friend recently asked me, as I checked my email on my phone during a lunch date. “I mean, we’re at a diner.”

“I need to make sure the email I sent in to my professor made it. And if my internship got back to me about possibly skipping Monday…” I could have kept talking about what I needed to do, but the waiter was setting down a delicious plate of hummus and stuffed grape leaves. I cannot deny a good stuffed grape leaf.

My diner friend isn’t the first person to point out how much I work, how busy I keep my schedule. Moving forward in my career has always been a giant part of my life.

But these days, it’s an even bigger part. Why? Because the moment I calm down is the moment I realize work is just about the only thing I’ve got. Read More »

After writing a little bit about Second Life, I got to thinking about the types of people who play it. And then I got to thinking about the sex lives of those people. And then I shuddered a little, but also wondered:

Do geeks make good boyfriends?

Because the internet is all expansive and all knowing, someone has already answered that question for me in a convenient, numbered fashion.

Many of the reasons are funny, and most make a lot of sense. Like number 6:

“[geeks] are quite good at remembering dates. Like birthdates and such, especially if they know it’ll make you happy. Due to their neglected status, they’re more attentive than guys who “have more options”. Plus, with all that down time without a steady girlfriend, they’ll likely have mental lists of all the things they’d love to do once they GOT a girlfriend.”

Having never dated a tried and true Geek before (although I did have a brief fling with someone who was a closet nerd…which wasn’t the reason we broke up…as far as he knew), I’m not the biggest expert on socially awkward people in relationships. However, the guy geeks I’ve been acquainted with over the years do tend to treat their girlfriends with an amazing amount of care. Read More »