With Ms. D dead, they got to delay Ali’s return to Rosewood High. Let’s see what happened instead:
1. Creepiness sets in: I was getting a very strange “Twin Peaks” kind of vibe from the opening of the show last night. The show opened with Ali curled up in bed having a Bella Swan moment since she wouldn’t get out of bed for days. Unlike Bella, it was due to her mom dying so that’s totes understandable. But when she did finally get up, it was for the funeral and guess what Ali did? She wore her mother’s dress that she wore to Ali’s funeral!! Whoever wrote that is a sick, twisted genius that I’d love to meet. In the next scene, the girls meet with Rosewood’s principal and he seemed very wooden yet serial killer-esque. His weirdness probably didn’t mean anything but it was jarring.
2. The New Girl: I’m one of ten people that watched “The Carrie Diaries,” so I got super excited when I saw that Donna LaDonna is the new girl at Rosewood. Instead of playing a terrific bitch like she did in her last show, this time she’s channeling her inner single white female. Girl has a serious obsession/infatuation/crush on Emily that seems like it will venture into “I want to wear her face territory.” Paige feels hella intimidated by her though, since she tries to sabotage Emily’s swimming lesson with her. I’m not sure I want them back together but sometimes it’s fun to watch people try.
3. E tu, Papa Hastings?”: I now understand why there’s barely any parental guidance on this show since half the parents may be murders. Jason dropped a bomb on Spencer when he shared with her that he believes that their father, Mr. Hastings, may be the one who killed Mrs. D! Her father did act shady the whole episode. He picked up Ali in the middle of the night and he barely defended himself about the unsent email on Mrs. D’s computer. But I guess you don’t have to defend yourself when you have Melissa the pitbull to attack on your behalf. There’s something they’re not telling Spencer obvi. There family is a mess, just sayin’.
4. Hanna: The new girl wasn’t the only SWF this week! After Hanna was mistaken for Al by the funeral director, the show gave us these delicious flashbacks in which Mona helped Hanna be the new Ali. Homegirl was actually saying stuff like “You should be the next Ali.” There was also a flashback of Mona and Hanna strutting down the halls holding hands…it was strange, weird, and wild. But because Hanna is the best/most self-aware person on this show, she even knew that she was suffering an identity crisis.
5. The return of Ezra: He’s back. Hooray. My heart can’t stand it. He looks better with his scruff though. He made this vague statement to Aria about being willing to help her. Is he going to help cover up the Shana murder? Otherwise that, they have no reason to talk. Even as I write that, I know that won’t stop them. I will say my new phrase for when I’m beyond caring, “I wish them the best.”
That’s all for this week, until next time!
Your Pretty Little Liars Cheat Sheet: Season 5, Episode 3
