Amy Poehler’s Book Comes Out Today, Celebrate Accordingly

yes-please-copy-618x400

Everyone’s favorite Leslie Knope released a book today, and she’s dropping serious truth bombs to promote it. She’s talking sex, divorce, drug use, and motherhood, all with her typically charming, feminist twist. After similar feminist-friendly manifestos but celebrity authors like Tina Fey, Lena Dunham, and Caitlin Moran, everyone’s been waiting to see what Leslie would say, and it’s just as engaging as we wanted.

There are few couples that I’m emotionally invested in, but I’m pretty sure I stopped believing in love when Amy and Will Arnett announced their divorce. Luckily, she’s back, better than ever, and dating Nick Kroll (who’s absolutely hysterical on The League). Amy rebounded with Uncle Jesse in between, which would’ve been a real dream couple, although I doubt Uncle Jesse could create the ridiculously adorable babies that Amy and Will made (real talk: have you seen their little gingerbread man?). Throughout the book, Amy stays tight-lipped on her notorious divorce, declaring it, “too sad and too personal.”

After classes today, run to the nearest bookstore, because Amy’s advice is necessary. Here are a couple tidbits/spoiler alerts to prepare you mentally and physically:

On getting it in:

“Try not to fake it: I know you are tired/nervous/eager to please/unsure of how to get there. Just remember to allow yourself real pleasure and not worry about how long it takes…God punished us with the gift of being able to fake it. Show God who the real boss is by getting off and getting yours.”

On drug use (because you need energy to be on SNL):

“In my twenties I tried cocaine, which I instantly loved but eventually hated. Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don’t know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It’s bad for almost everything else… The day after cocaine is rough…The next day is the thing I can’t pull off anymore. How do you explain to a four-and-six-year old that you can’t play Rescue Bots because you have to spend all day in bed eating Cape Cod potato chips and watching The Bicycle Thief?”

On her maybe-date with Uncle Jesse:

  • 10614935101348454