Sleeping over your boyfriend’s place sounds awesome in theory. You don’t have to make your way home late at night alone and you get to cuddle all night long. But reality vs. expectations usually differ greatly. While you’re trying to enjoy time with bae, your body and mind seem to be working against you. You’ll forget deodorant even though it’s a permanent fixture in your purse or be so uncomfortable that the only place you want to be is your own bed. It’s not just you.
1. You get your period.
It’s inevitable. That time of the month seems to just perfectly aline with not being home for the weekend. Not only do you have to find an excuse to run to the pharmacy to grab tampons, but you’ll also be suffering through cramps that your boyfriend just doesn’t understand. Ouch…
2. You forget your toothbrush or other essential.
There’s nothing worse than going to bed without that clean feeling in your mouth…except waking up with stinky breath and having to pull one of those moves where you just spread toothpaste around your mouth and hope for the best.
3. You get hungry but don’t want to say anything.
Is it rude? Probably not, but the chances of a guy having something good that won’t kill your beach season diet are slim. At home you can just grab an apple from the fridge. Here, you have to BYO snacks.
4. You can’t fall asleep.
So you spend hours staring at the ceiling, trying not to move around too much so he doesn’t wake up. All you want to do is lull yourself to sleep with a few episodes of New Girl, but you just lay there while your arm goes numb from laying on it.
5. You wake up first.
Borrriiinnnggg. You wait patiently for him to wake up so you can make a run to the bagel shop, but he is out like a light. Maybe the sound of your stomach rumbling with wake him eventually.
6. You feel sick.
You try to be tough and make it through all your activities without complaints, but inside you just want to throw on your oldest sweatpants and crawl into bed. Not a great look.
7. You’ll change plans and feel under- or overdressed
If your initial plans were to chill out at the apartment for the night but suddenly you’re going to a club, you’re scrambling to make your jeans and old t-shirt look like they’re appropriate for a night out. Maybe no one really notices, but it’s all your mind can focus on all night.
8. You need to shower but he doesn’t have good shampoo and conditioner.
Either you have to remember to plan ahead and bring your own travel-size hair products, or you’ll be cursed with greasy hair by Sunday.
9. You have to live out of a bag.
After you’ve selected a bag that can fit all your stuff for a night or two (it’s a lot of stuff) yet won’t make you look like a hobo, you do your best to cram makeup, hair products, clothes, shoes, Advil, tampons, and anything else there’s a 50% or more chance you’ll be needing that you know he doesn’t have. It’s no easy feat.
10. You get caught doing something weird by his roommates.
While BF is in the shower or on a beer run, you take the opportunity to do something weird like pop a zit in the hallway mirror or go through his kitchen on a search for scissors. His roommate will emerge and caught off-guard, you start acting sketchy, even if you weren’t doing anything sketchy. So now they think you’re crazy.
11. You’ll want to shave.
When your leg grazes up against him in an attempt to be sexy, you realize you haven’t shaved your legs and want to die. Suddenly, you feel gross and pretty much the opposite of sexy.
12. You have to go…”number two.”
First off, curse that extra slice of pizza. Second, deny. Deny girls do that, deny you have ever had to go, and most of all, deny any smell. Courtesy flush and maybe combine your go with a shower or putting on makeup so you don’t take a suspiciously long time. God speed.