It’s stories like these that make me consider packing up with my dog and starting a colony on Mars, far away from this nonsense.
According to the Portland Press Herald, defense attorneys in Portland, Maine, were asked to remove their bras before entering the Cumberland County Jail to speak with their clients.
Amy Fairfield, an attorney, says she learned of the new “policy” when she went to meet with a client in the jail. She went through the metal detector, only to have it be set off by the underwire metal in her bra. The man asked, “Are you wearing an underwire bra? Might I suggest you go to the bathroom and take that off?”
Fairfield responded, “I will not. I am completely offended at that notion.” She recalls that she has been asked to take off jewelry and a hair clip before entering the jail, but never her bra. The man informed her that it was the jail administrator, Major John Costello, who updated the policy requiring women to do so.
Society dictates that women need to wear bras, but then run for the hills because they pose a security danger. It’s not bras you should be afraid of. You should be afraid of the possibility of a woman’s breasts turning into angry dog launching cannons. Let’s be real: the only danger underwire poses is when it accidentally shanks you in the boob because your bra is so old. A grand emphasis on the “you” because the underwire isn’t hurting anybody else but the wearer.
Another attorney, Gina Yamartino, was asked to remove her bra at the jail even though she had never had this problem before. Costello told her to “wear a different bra” amongst other suggestions. Yamartino points out that this policy is affecting her clients who can’t see her because she’s wearing an underwire bra.
God forbid she exercise her agency to purchase and wear an underwire bra.
Attorney Sarah Churchill heard these stories and decided to test the policy out for herself. She successfully entered the jail, wearing an underwire bra nonetheless, without issue. Churchill said, “The TSA doesn’t ask me to take my bra off. The feds don’t ask me to take my bra off, but the Cumberland County Jail thinks it’s appropriate? You’ve got to be kidding me” in a letter to the members of the Maine bar association.
Sheriff Kevin Joyce said that the policy update should have never have happened because the policy prohibits “weapons and contraband.”
So, where do underwire bras fit in with all of that?
The affected attorneys asked Joyce to apologize, but he refuses to do so until a full investigation of what happened that day at the jail is completed.
Fairfield stated that she “appreciate[s] that he recognizes that [she] shouldn’t have to take off [her] clothes to see [her] clients.”
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