Let’s Talk About Chad: Bachelorette Recap, Season 12, Episode 2

Let me start off by apologizing for the amount we are about to discuss Chad.

The producers have clearly given us our villain, and it’s very real to me. This episode was 87% Chad being mean or eating meat on sticks, and it cannot be ignored. I didn’t totally love everything that the other dudes did to confront him this episode (I’m lookin’ at you, Alex) but Chad is straight up actually a bomb fueled on protein and ham and he’s going to explode. To be honest, I’m really not looking forward to it.

Chad is, in summary, a complete bag of dicks. Everything that comes out of his mouth is the definition of misogyny. I feel like I myself am maturing in the sense that even though he is smokin’ hot (like he may physically be the man of my dreams) – he does absolutely nothing for me because of what a bag of dicks he is. These guys were spot on when they called him meat head to the max. Also, most of these dudes are in the same shape as Chad and they somehow found a way to keep in shape without strapping a weight belt and their  suitcase to their bod while doing pull ups.

I have to say, I do appreciate his realness – he mentions several times that they know literally nothing about JoJo but the other dudes are completely obsessed with her. I agree with him there. But the fact that he didn’t get in on their sing alongs is NOT a good look. Kitchen-sing-a-long is my middle name. Further more, when he says this out loud, he says it as though he’s ready to punch someone in the face if they disagree with him (and this includes JoJo).

One last thing that confused me about Chad was when he went on a rant on how girls should never trust the nice guys because the nice guys are assholes. He kept stating that he himself is not an asshole, it’s the good guys girls have to look out for. What does this even mean? I think the name Chad by definition means asshole. Know how else I know Chad sucks? He became BFFLs with Daniel. DANIEL.

Let’s move on to the other dudes in the house, though, shall we?

Dates on this show are always weird the first few weeks. Let’s just all admit that we are in this initial part out of necessity rather than entertainment. The first date this week was a firefighting date – and I must say It’s strange how she kept calling it a date when there was none dialogue between her and the men. In fact, she didn’t even actually participate. She just watched them lift heavy things and run. Which by the way, is not the only way a man can be a man.

I felt so bad for sweet Wells – who is hilarious and sexy in his own right (remember that time he brought All4One on night one?!) but was looked at like a total loser in this “date.” He definitely almost passed out. Sweet pale Wells – this is not where he shines.

And yes, I see the irony in complaining about a sexist date on a show where 25 men are competing to literally win the hand of a girl they don’t know – but nonetheless. Jojo waiting on top of the tower, three dudes running in full fire gear to win a date with her. I just. I have to move on.

Derek got the first one on one date – he’s a cutie for sure. I also was really, really into this date. I like that they had different options along the way. When I go on a first date the option is usually tacos or brewery – I literally cannot imagine getting to take a private jet to San Fransisco. Though I imagine I would be more likely to fall in love with someone after four hours if that was the case.

Derek is nice but boring, I’m sure he’ll make it relatively far. He told JoJo he was cheated on in a very awkward way, I felt a little sad, but not really because that’s life and they were probably 22 when they started dating and what did they even know about love? They seemed to bond and get along pretty well though, and that was nice. Derek is nice.

I have to be honest I think I fast forwarded too far through the second group date, because I blinked and they were at ESPN doing strange activities on turf. Then Chad told JoJo he shouldn’t have to tell her why he loves her when he proposes and he said she was nagging him. This actually happened.

You guys. I actively hate this person so much. There’s a difference between being honest and being a huge douche. He has a million red flags and if she passes this off as some quirky character flaw that will be a big issue. I found myself screaming at the TV for him to stop talking as he picked apart every single flaw in every single dude as they went up for their roses. His giggle in the interview as he told the producers he liked her just about pushed me over the edge.

So, I hate Chad. Most of this recap has been about how much I hate Chad (I warned you). But what I dislike even more is when these dudes band together over literaly nothing. Short man Alex was about to have a hernia because Chad had a conversation with her outside before the cocktail party. Come on man, relax. You do what you gotta do to get time!

It didn’t get any better – the entire rose ceremony was half a series of awkward semi confrontations where the other men kind of told Chad they were upset but not really. The other half of the rose ceremony was Chad eating all of the meat. Literally all of it. This is astounding because I have actually never seen a person eat on this show – I had no idea they had food at the cocktail parties. I’m actually wondering if they had this spread because Chad requested it because he can’t miss meals. Because Crossfit and Paleo.

Not surprisingly, Chad is around for another week. She really likes him because he’s incredibly attractive and isn’t giving her the attention everyone else is, so she finds that sexy. Because nature. I’m just really hoping he doesn’t last much longer because this was a hard episode for me to get through, and judging by the next week on, it’s not going to get any better for us.

What do y’all think? Am I overreacting or is this guy the worst thing to happen to the franchise since Juan Pablo and the “ees ok” fiasco?

This Italian University Student Was Burned Alive by Her Boyfriend After She Broke Up With Him
This Italian University Student Was Burned Alive by Her Boyfriend After She Broke Up With Him
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