Arizona is Holding a Clown Lives Matter Peace Walk, So Don’t Go to Arizona

If there’s one thing I have zero sympathy for in this world, it’s clowns. They’re absolutely terrifying with their creepy red noses, gargantuan-sized clothes and really bad makeup. But Arizona clearly isn’t on the same page.

After countless clown sightings were reported throughout the country, Arizona is taking a stand and shooting down the stigma that all clowns are out to kill you in your sleep. A Clown Lives Matter peace walk is scheduled to take place in Tucson on October 15, and they even have a Facebook page making it official. [Editor’s note: we will not be showing it because we aren’t that masochistic.]

Attendees are encouraged to dress up as a clown and even don a mask, which for the record is terrifying. Organizers are advertising the walk with a flyer that reads “This is a peaceful way to show clowns are not psycho killers. We want the public to feel safe, and not be afraid. So come out, bring the family, meet a clown and get a hug!” More than 100 people are expected to show up.

Um… something tells me this isn’t the best idea. But professional clowns refused to be silenced. Snuggles the Clown from Pennsylvania said his career has been tarnished since the sightings started making their way to the media. He claims that his family wants him to quit his job in fear that he will be arrested or hurt by clown hunters.

“Everyone took this as a joke but it’s really become serious now, and I just want all these teenagers to know that it’s not a game anymore,” he said in an interview Tuesday. “You’re ruining my job and other actors around the world.  I went outside for a photo shoot and people were driving by taking pictures saying they are going to call the cops because they profiled me as one of the clowns in the woods.”

He continued, “They need a positive role model like myself. Yes, I’m in the clown suit, but at the end of the day I’m a brother, I’m a nephew, I’m an uncle, I have a family.”

While we’re sure there are other performers who feel the same, it doesn’t excuse the fact that a ton of recent clown-related events ended in turmoil. A 13-year-old student tried getting one to kill her teachers last week. There was also a young teen in Texas who was charged with making a terroristic threat after posting a clown’s hit list online. She told authorities she only did it to try and stop “real clowns” from coming after her school.

Several teens in Connecticut were also arrested this week after making clown threats on Instagram, while New Haven public schools banned the costume from Halloween this year after several clown accounts started telling schools to “watch out” on social media.

Yup, it’s weird. Sorry Snuggles, we’re steering clear of anything painted with a smile and carrying a horn for very long time.

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