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Well, it’s been nice knowing all of you. The presidential inauguration of Donald Trump is rapidly approaching. How we got to this point – where we’re giving a racist, misogynistic, ignorant reality TV show host a ton of power over the fate of the country – we have no idea. But everyone is pretty much entirely screwed.
Okay, it may not the ACTUAL end of the world…but that doesn’t mean we can’t drink like it is.
Between Melania Trump’s scramble to find a designer and the many performers who have refused to work the inauguration, we were all kind of hoping it just wouldn’t happen. But since it is, here’s a drinking game that will help ease our transition into a future filled with uncertainty and dumb presidential Twitter wars.
Presidential Inauguration Drinking Game
Once the inauguration ceremony begins:
*Take a sip each time Trump uses the word “huge.”
*Take a sip every time Trump says he’ll “make America great again.”
*Take a sip whenever Trump compliments himself.
*Take two sips each time the camera pans over the Trump family.
*Take two sips when the audience starts chanting someone’s name.
*Take two sips if you see someone crying in the audience.
*Take a shot if you see an American flag.
*Take a shot whenever someone you’re with starts yelling at the TV.
*Take a shot every time you remember Obama will no longer be in the White House.
*Chug your drink if a performer screws up.
*Chug your drink when Trump takes his oath. If he’s still talking after you finish drinking, get another drink.
*Chug the rest of your drink if you start to have an existential crisis so you can numb your pain and anxiety about the future.
Cheers to the next four booze-filled years, my friends!