Being pregnant is supposed to be a joyous time in a person’s life, but becoming pregnant is a whole other struggle. Some people have a hard time getting pregnant and remaining pregnant.
A miscarriage is when someone who is pregnant loses their fetus in under 20 weeks. It is spontaneous and can’t be reversed. Some women have many miscarriages before a fetus actually sticks.
There is a huge stigma surrounding having a miscarriage. The number one way to break down a stigma is to talk about it and that’s exactly what one Instagram account is hoping to do.
Dr. Jessica Zucker runs an Instagram called IHadAMiscarriage.
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@translucentdreamm shares: "23 was a year of firsts for me. I would have been 15 weeks along if my little one decided to stay with me. I didn't know anything about miscarriages before my loss. It's not really something the average woman researches. So when #ihadamiscarriage I was so beside myself, confused, and in shock. I felt like the only one on earth at that time. I was angry with my body for failing me. I was even ashamed, and felt like I couldn't open up and talk about what happened. Almost as if I did something wrong. Even now it's hard to share this, even with all the acceptance and strength that I've built along the way. It's a hard battle to overcome. Not one day goes by without me thinking about that Saturday in April. Not one day goes by without me yearning and missing the feeling of beauty that I had when I was carrying my little one inside me. The thought that my body created a tiny human that was part me and part my lover was more beauty than I had ever felt in my 23 years. All of that vanishing is hard to swallow. It leaves you in a state of disparity. Today I am sharing my story and writing this in hopes to reach all the women who feel alone and misunderstood in their loss. I am sharing this to end the self-blame and the shame that comes along with it. You are not alone, I am here and so are millions of women that have been and are going through this. I don't want anyone to ever feel like they don't have someone to reach out to. You are strong, and your feelings are valid and you are capable and beautiful. I love you all. We will overcome and heal together✨💕 " _ #IHadAMiscarriage #endthesilence #1in4 #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #grief #loss
Women can submit their stories about their miscarriages and support and empower others like them. Having a space to share these stories creates a support system and community.
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Anonymous shares: "Yesterday we found out the gender of our rainbow baby. The baby is healthy, and it's a boy. _ I'm torn. _ It goes without saying that I wanted my rainbow to be healthy above all but deep down I was hoping for a girl because my 2nd trimester miscarriage was a girl. _ I spent so much time dreaming about having a daughter and wished so badly that my rainbow would also be a girl. I knew I couldn't control the gender. But, something about losing a girl made me almost obsessed with having one. _ I didn't realize how the results of this test would affect me. _ I sobbed for an hour. I kept thinking "I wanted this be baby to be a girl." I then immediately felt guilty: It's not this new baby's fault. He couldn't control what happened before. It's a healthy baby-shouldn't I be relieved? I am relieved but I am also incredibly disappointed. This is hard to admit, but it is my current truth. I just need a little time to switch gears to dreaming about a boy instead of the girl. _ These test results – finding out the sex of this baby – stirred a newfound wave of grief. Maybe it's the good health results making it all the more real (and scary). But it is also the hope of having a girl lost, taken away. This has been the most difficult part so far of pregnancy after experiencing pregnancy loss. _ I need to love this baby boy. And I know in my heart I will. And of course, I will always miss my girl." _ Can you relate? _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #pregnancyafterloss #grief #loss #rainbowbaby #motherhood #stillbirth #infantloss #1in4 // Photograph of @taja_janel taken by @marymcinema.
The page has grown to be a space for mothers to talk about all of the issues that are stigmatized about motherhood.
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@imlauramiller shares: "When I found out I was pregnant I cried, not out of happiness but out of terror, because I was already 2 months into the scariest depression of my life and knew I wasn't healthy enough to deal with the physical and emotional challenges of a pregnancy, much less becoming a mother. I've dealt with depression for 20+ years and am very familiar with enduring the ups and downs of life, but this was a new horrifying depth. I spent months not wanting to be alive. I haven't been able to work, and I am embarrassed about that. I have to remind myself that my accomplishments over the past 15 months are that I grew this healthy girl and that I survived. I'm now back on an antidepressant medication that saved my life once before. I don't like being on it because my ego makes me feel bad about it, and because people that don't understand think it's a cheap and easy way out. It's not. Some of us out here have brains that can't be cured from green juice and exercise and therapy, and that's ok. My warrior of a husband wrote a song about fighting through this together and it's called Joan of Arc, if you want to Spotify/google it. I love him and I love Mae. We made it out the other side and I'm going to wear color and be funny again I promise." _ #IHadAMiscarriage #motherhood #depression #mentalhealth #ppd #anxiety #speakupwhenyouredown #pregnancy #perinataldepression #womenshealth
Rhe stories that are shared are beautiful and offer a different perspective of motherhood. It’s definitely worth creeping through, even if you don’t plan on having kids for a loooooong time.