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Having a really bad experience with anal can take a toll on your emotional well-being. There are many things that can go wrong when you go anal that can hurt you, and even traumatize you.
But don’t worry! You can recover from a really bad anal sex experience whether if it was your first time or not.
If it’s your first time, there is a chance you won’t know what to expect because, let’s admit it, sex-ed in the United States sucks and how to engage safely in anal sex is sometimes left out of the curriculum.
1. Educate yourself in anal sex
“It might seem boring, but re-education about how to prepare and properly treat our bodies during anal play will highly empower your experience,” said Alicia Sinclair, a certified sex educator and founder of b-Vibe to Cosmopolitan. “Plus, you’ll probably learn a few enjoyable, new tricks you didn’t even know about.”
Remember using condoms is primordial in order to avoid STIs and HIV. Using lube will make the experience way better.
2. Play by yourself first
Try toys and plugs with different sizes and girths (along with lots of lube) to know your limits better.
3. Once you are ready, start slow
You need to be realistic. There is a high chance that you are probably not into anal play. That’s why is good to play with yourself first. If anal sex is not your thing, don’t worry the sky is the limit when it comes to what you can do in the bedroom with your partner.
4. Go to therapy
“It’s really helpful to process those emotions, especially if you do want anal play to be a part of your sexual diet,” said Sinclair to Cosmopolitan. “Even though humans are resilient and strong, we still need support and self-care to overcome trauma and to have pleasurable sex lives beyond negative sexual experiences.”
Do yourself a favor, don’t engage in anal sex with someone you don’t trust or who doesn’t treat you well.
5. Forgive
As I stated before, if you went into anal sex without knowing really what to expect, don’t blame yourself for anything that went wrong. Chances are you didn’t get proper sex-ed that included anal sex.
