Do I even have to ask what you think?

Hey, LiLo – put on a bra!

American Idol is really scraping for some judges.

Brad Pitt likes the pot.

Brett Favre really needs to make up his damn mind.

Can Keri Hilson save R. Kelly’s career?

Hey, remember Trapped in the Closet? You know, R. Kelly’s AMAZING twenty-three part R&B soap opera chronicling the twists and turns in the life of protagonist Sylvester (R. Kelly) and about ten million secondary characters who are all tangled in the same sexy web of lies and interconnected boot-knockin’? Well R. Kelly’s Trial Debating Whether Or Not I Am In Fact A Huge Creep That Pisses On Underage Girls On Video is like Trapped in the Closet, but so so so much more kick ass.

To give you a little background, it all started in 2002 when music critic Jim DeRogatis was given a video by a currently unnamed source featuring what appeared to be R. Kelly giving an allegedly underage girl money, then getting a BJ from her, having sex with her, and pissing on her. DeRogatis broke the story in the Chicago Sun-Times, and shortly thereafter R. Kelly was charged with soliciting a minor for child pornography, seven counts of videotaping the acts, and seven counts of producing child pornography. Now, six years after the initial indictment, the trial has begun and it’s like the sexy remix of the O.J. Simpson trial. Read More »

So in the land of the rising sun, a woman was trapped in the closet. Oddly like R. Kelly. Since she was there for like a year, I imagine there were some moments not unlike those found in Mr. Kelly’s masterwork. What am I talking about?

Well for those of you who ignore the news clickers no doubt found to the side of your email logins, in Japan (aka: Weird Capital of the World) a homeless woman was caught living in a man’s closet. Not for like a week. Not a month. A year.

And the guy was living there. Not just in and out. He lived there.

Seriously, she was like his secret roommate. Like a mooching ninja. He wouldn’t have noticed anything if food didn’t start disappearing. How quiet was she if he never heard her? Or did he hear her and just assume it was just his neighbors making noise? You know, coming from the direction of his closet…In his apartment. Read More »

R. Kelly.

Judging by his recent foray into rap musical sagas, one can only imagine that the guy either takes himself way, way, way too seriously, or has biggest sense of humor ever.

But here’s something else Kelly has a lot of: pending child pornography charges.

So, why hasn’t he even stepped foot inside a courthouse?

The obvious answer is that our justice system is screwed up, and lawyers can keep you running from charges that are over 5 years old for as long as your money holds out.

Besides the 21 counts of child pornography filed in June of 2002 (over a sex tape allegedly made in 1997, which prosecutors claim shows Kelly having sex with a girl around 14 years old), there were 12 other counts (filed in 2003, but not included in the main trail) of allged pornography attached to photographs of the singer and another naked under-aged girl.

While most offenders face a maximum of 15 years in prison if convicted of such acts, Kelly has successfully pushed his trail back time and time again; a jury selection scheduled for September 17 the most recent postponement. Read More »

The momentous MTV Video Music Awards are on the horizon, and even though they haven’t been so momentous in recent years (seriously, the show has gone way downhill since I was in high school) there have been some pretty unforgettable speeches and performances in the past 15 years.

Yeah, the VMA’s are totally boring but that doesn’t mean some pretty crazy shit hasn’t gone down in the past. Want some proof? Check out these 5 crazy VMA moments…maybe this year will live up to these:

#5: Michael Jackson sucking face with then-wife Lisa Marie Presley. Absolutely gross, but just like a car wreck, could anyone not watch? Even Lisa Marie looked insanely uncomfortable and not in the least bit horny.

#4: Nirvana’s bassist gets slammed in the face with his guitar. When you’re trying to look like a hard-ass, it never works out. Krist Novoselic learned the hard way when he threw his bass up in the air to be “cool” and instead, the thing came crashing down on his skull and he passed out for a minute or two. Yea, real cool.

#3: Justin’s reaction to Britney kissing Madonna. The kiss itself was pretty much no big deal, but the look on JT’s face is priceless. It’s like fire could burst out of his eyeballs at any second. Little did he know she would soon look like this. Read More »

Ah, yes Father’s Day… a time to give praise to the first man in your life. So in celebration of Dad’s around the world, AOLMusic has compiled a list of 11 music men that have become less-than-desirable fathers. Happy Father’s Day.

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Whenever a celebrity, and more specifically, a pop star, is caught on camera doing something stupid, lame, idiotic or illegal, I must admit there is a part of me that relishes in the embarrassment. What can I say? I guess I’m just an evil person who finds pleasure in the oh-so-ironic pain of the rich, famous and beautiful ones who fall victim to the same thing they’ve wanted all along – the spotlight.

Blender has dug deep (as there are waaay too many to list) to establish the Top 20 Most Embarrassing Pop Star Video Moments. Some moments are recent and some are from pop’s forgotten past. Some moments are mild and some are mean. Some moments are self-induced by drugs, and some are just self-induced by plain stupidity. Whatever the case, from Nirvana to Paris, they are all golden moments, and touchstones in the culture that is pop.

Revel in K-Fed’s face as he is dumped by Britney via text. Snicker as Lindsay is publicly referred to as a “firecrotch” with giant labia. Ouch. Cringe as R. Kelly, and YES, that is indeed R. Kelly, as he checks to see that the shot of him peeing on his much younger, female counterpart, will be caught at just the right angle. GROSS. Read More »

I listen to a lot of music. A lot of music. I’m sort of a music whore, downloading new stuff all the time, listening to it 12 times in a row, and then getting bored and looking for the next big thing. iTunes is like my pimp; I just can’t say no, even though it charges too much and never says thank you.

Because of this fixation, I have heard a lot of bad lyrics in my time. If the music is bumpin’, sometimes it’s allowed. But every once in a while I come across a line I cannot let go. A sentence that is so horrible, so strange, so stupid, that I must find the lyrics online and dissect them.

Apparently, this website has the same obsession.

Some examples?

“Relentless lust/

Of rotting flesh/

To thrash the tomb she lies/

Heathen whore/

Of Satan’s wrath/

I spit at your demise” – Slayer

(Ah. Heathen whore. One of my favorite nicknames.) Read More »

Oh yes, the wait is finally over. The now infamously over-hyped “Kim Kardashian Superstar” sex tape hits the stands today at a porno shop near you. Can somebody remind me again, why I should care about this talentless nobody getting shagged and dragged every which way AND loose?

Maybe I am out of line. And to Kim’s defense, I have yet to see this vacant Vivid Video release- Who knows, maybe she polishes a knob like nobody’s business and we all could learn a trick or two from the superstar socialite. Pfft… Doubtful. I think the only trick here is Kim herself.

There is however an upside for Ms. Kardashian. According to NinjaDude.com, portions of the video have been edited out- “most notably the watersports portion.” Don’t worry shower fans, you still got R Kelly.