In case you somehow escaped Twitter, boycotted all classes, ignored the stray subway newspaper, and dodged all forms of human interaction this week, you need to know: this was an absolute garbage week.
First, there was the (somehow unexpected) backlash to the least-effective Pepsi commercial to ever be shot:
the last time pepsi left such a bad taste in my mouth was literally every time coke wasnt available
— jonny sun (@jonnysun) April 5, 2017
Then, United Airlines raised them one by physically dragging (and injuring) a passenger off a plane who just wanted to get to his destination safely, please:
United: We just did the worst thing.
Me: Hold my beer…I just need to put my wallet away. Ok. Thanks so much.
(Am I doing Twitter right?)
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) April 11, 2017
Then, the trash bags convincingly assembled into human being Sean Spicer began to wilt a bit when he suggested that Hitler wasn’t, you know, that bad, and concentration camps were… “Holocaust centers.”
Naturally, many people drew parallels between three incidents. All three were PR nightmares that resulted in major backlash, and each somehow managed to be more offensive and downright atrocious than the previous event.
between Pepsi, United and Sean Spicer, there's been more half-assed begging for forgiveness than a 90s r & b album
— Robin Thede (@robinthede) April 11, 2017
Well, yesterday Pepsi was grateful for United, and today United is grateful for Sean Spicer.
— George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) April 11, 2017
There was much beer to be held:
PEPSI: Check out this PR disaster.
UNITED: That's amateur hour. Watch -this-!
SEAN SPICER: Hold my beer.
— Jesse McLaren (@McJesse) April 11, 2017
Pepsi: We offended everyone!
United: hold my beer
Sean Spicer: hold my beer
Trump: hold my beer
— Jeremy Baker (@Jeremy_Baker) April 12, 2017
However, not all was lost. Ben Carson, in a beautiful twist of fate, was stuck in an elevator at a public housing complex.
Pepsi- We screwed up!
United- Let us show you how to screw up!
Sean Spicer- Hold my beer!
Ben Carson- *sleeping in an elevator*
— Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) April 12, 2017
Here’s hoping this doesn’t become a weekly series.