I’ve gone to a doctor for emergency contraception three times. Every experience has been different. The first two instances occurred years apart; the second and third happened within months of each other. I’ve gone whilst in monogamous relationships, and after casual sex. I’ve gone to a doctor’s office, an emergency room, and Planned Parenthood. Only one thing remained the same: I was never ready to get pregnant.

EC, for those not in the know, is a blanket term for a variety of medications that change your body’s chemistry to reduce your chances of getting pregnant. Plan B is the most popular, and it’s wonderful for many reasons. Yet, with the exception of the occasions on which various looney-pantsed individuals have pitched a fit about its legality (because we all know that unwed mothers are sacred to the right wing), very few people talk about it.

Because I think this is lame, and because I enjoy sharing a bit too much about my body, I’ve decided to give a run-down of my EC experiences. I’ve split it into two parts: The Problem, in which I almost get pregnant, and The Cure, in which I don’t.

Read away. Read More »

It seems “the pill” is the only drug losing popularity in Hollywood. Can Juicy Maternity handle the baby boom?

Minnie Driver is now one of many pregnant celebs complete with their very own website to celebrate the joys of expecting ! She’s joining the ranks of 24′s Mary Lynn Rajskub, Halle Berry, Gwen and Gavin, who are expecting their second, the unsurprising and to-be-confirmed Brangelina, Jessica Alba, AND Ethan Hawke’s ex-nanny (to his children we presume). The Bellini baskets will be going like hotcakes!

Parenthood is the new Chloe bag, and if Nicole Richie can pull it off, Little Spears just had to jump on that bandwagon. You can practically hear Brit screaming “She’s copying me!” from UCLA’s medical center. Let’s hope Jamie Lynn didn’t take K-Fed out of her speed dial on the off chance she keeps her little bundle of scandal after toughing out the pregnancy… He’s full of post-partum career tips, and maybe can even write a birthday rap! Read More »

Finding ourselves restless and deliriously ADD by Christmas night, my sister and I escaped our minimum security prison (i.e. home) for a movie date to see Juno, that new film with uber-talented Ellen Page, so-endearing-you-want-to-bite-him Michael Cera, and Jennifer Garner.

Anyway, halfway through the movie I realized how strange it is how much pregnancy has been belittled through the media lately? First there was Knocked Up, which basically made a huge (and addictively funny) joke out of getting preggo off a one-night-stand, something I’m sure girls everywhere didn’t exactly have on their Christmas list.

Then, there’s the crazy celebrity baby boom what with J.Lo, Nicole Richie, Jessica Alba, oh hey and now, the Mini Spears, now that’s hot. With so many preg-celebs with tabloids booming, “Mommy-to-be-still beautiful as ever!” and whatever else they cook up, I just feel like everwhere I turn it’s preggo this preggo that. Read More »

As I mentioned once before, I have issues with my birth control.

In fact, with all the horrible side effects like the migraines and weight gain I feel like the only reason the pill is even working is because it is preventing me from going out to find someone to have sex with. And I am not so sure that is how it is supposed to work.

I have attempted to stick it out for the past six months, but, considering I have been sans sex for quite some time, I am about ready to throw in the towel. My doctor – always the optimist – didn’t like that idea.

“Lauren, I know you joke about being a crazy cat woman, but you will have sex again someday and you might regret your decision to stop taking birth control.”

She had a point. Maybe one day I might again have the urge to do something besides catch up on my TiVo on a Friday night. You know; like go out and meet a man. And have sex. She recommended a different form of birth control that minimized the side effects that have been haunting me for months.

Unfortunately, this one presents a whole new slew of problems. Read More »

• I really wish my contribution to society was “:-)”! I’m really jealous…seriously. (Wired.com)

• So, wait, it’s breaking news now that people like to look at attractive people and it only takes a half second to notice them? Any horny college kid could’ve told you that. (Yahoo News)

• If you have a tramp stamp, beware! All of those pregnancies that your stamp has been causing is going to make birth a lot more painful. (wsj.com)

• Bad News: You’re in college and weed is still illegal. Good News: As long as you’re not a raging pot-head. (denverpost.com)

• I almost forgot Halloween was coming. So, just in case you love candy as much as we do at College Candy (ha) check out some sweets that never made it onto store shelves. (i-mockery.com)

Good news for all of us sexually active birth control laden ladies. Studies show that our trusty BC may now protect against cancer! Just like tofu, but not like tanning beds!

According to the recent British study, which looked at 46,000 women over a 36-year period, taking the pill cut the risk by 12%. A whopping 12%!

Of course, there are the downfalls (there are always the downfalls.) If you take the pill for less than 8 years, you are covered in that measly 12%. If you take it for more than eight years, the study showed that the likelihood of cancer was raised 22%.

While breast cancer was not included in the decreased risk category, bowel, ovarian and uterine cancer was reduced in the ladies taking the pill for less than 8 years.

Finally, just a tiny bit of good news for the large percentage of women that have HPV. If, of course, you didn’t start doing it when you were 15, because a decade of birth control use can double your chances of getting uterine cancer. Read More »

You know how I know it’s gonna be a great day? Because the first thing I saw on the Internet this morning was a big, fat picture of the uterus of Stephanie Tanner, a.k.a Jodie Sweetin.

Didn’t you know uteruses of old T.G.I.F stars are good luck? It’s true.

Stephanie Tanner, who spent 9 unforgettable years causing shenanigans and making me jealous on Full House, (Tommy Page is so dreamy) with the same expression on her face, is now preggers! Not only that, but she sent her ultrasound pics to TMZ for what I can only guess is some hopeful media attention. Man, what some people will do….rather unnecessary if you ask me, but this is much better attention than her addiction to meth! Wee-hoo!

But Stephanie isn’t the only one with new developments (and in her case, developments also means “boob job”). Some updates on the fam:

Danny Tanner, a.k.a Bob Saget, recently had an HBO comedy special. Too bad it sucked. If you’re gonna do a whole bit on animal sex and incessantly curse, make it funny. Read More »

As we head back to college, there are a few things we must not forget; ample amounts of underwear (the more pairs of clean underwear a girl has, the less she has to visit the laundry), bathroom sandals (you know have no idea what’s gone on in those shower stalls), and condoms.

You can keep them in a cute little box, a nondescript bag, or right out on the nightstand (depending on how classy you plan on being), but just make sure you have them. Guys don’t always come prepared, and nothing ruins the mood faster than knocking on your friends’ doors for a spare.

In case you’re at a loss as to which condom to buy (because there are like 50,000 different choices), Women’s Health has compiled a list of some of the most “sensational” latex love gloves out there.

A few examples include:

LifeStyles Warming Pleasure: One of those water-based lubricated condoms that stimulates the “clitoris, labia, and vaginal wall”, this brand actually makes good on it’s claims, providing a “mild but very sensual” warming sensation.

Naturalamb: Since these “second skin” condoms don’t protect against STD’s, they’re recommended for monogamous couples. Made from natural animal membranes (yup), Naturalamb is supposedly the thinnest condom available—an awesome find for the long-term couple, as long as you’re alright about that whole ‘membrane’ thing… Read More »

This one’s for the guys.

Everyone knows condoms aren’t the easiest things to convince people to use. Whether they’re British and embarrassed, or just dumb and stupid, a lot of guys claim strapping on the latex glove makes everything less…intense.

In case you’ve got one these bitchy complainers on your hands (and really, why anyone would stick with an ass who whines about keeping himself from accidentally becoming a father?), British condom maker Futura Medical Plc may have finally made the condom that shuts him up for good.

According to a study the company released on Thursday, their new condoms help men “have firmer and bigger erections, as well as a longer-lasting sexual experience.” Read More »