I was scouring the web looking for inspiration for this week's column, and after the billionth "How to Blow Your Man's Mind" article, I reached the zenith of irritation. Not only are all of those articles redundant (the answer is always anal or BJs), heterosexist (not all ladies date guys, and lesbians do read mainstream media sites), but they're so disempowering.
No one wants to blurt out a few XXX words in the heat of the moment only to realize they sound ridiculous. But have no fear, we'll show you the basics on how to start talking dirty in the bedroom.
We are creatures of habit. Everything we repeatedly do says something about who we are as people. You repeatedly order vanilla ice ream? People say you're bland and hate taking risks. You make list after list for everything? People say you're anal and need to loosen up more. The same goes for your favorite sex position.
Something that is a must during those first few amazing make-out sessions with a new boo is the tunes that you're grooving to in the background.
Everybody knows the way to a man's heart might be through his stomach, but the way to keep a man's heart is through another organ.
While there are guys out there who genuinely don't care for oral, I think it's a pretty safe assumption that most do. Luckily, giving enjoyable head to a guy is a fairly easy-ish endeavor.
Mr. President, I thought you were one of the good guys. I thought you respected women, and knew that the power and freedom to make reproductive decisions should be protected and celebrated. That's why I'm so disappointed to see the backward, paternalistic stance you've taken on what is becoming known as "the Plan B debate."
We're not talking about crazy Cirque du Soleil moves or emptying your bank account on costumes. We're talking easy and simple moves in the bedroom that'll make him beg for more.
There's no guide on how to hook up in college, but here are a few definite "don'ts" if you're looking to keep things clean and simple.
Safe sex is the best sex, girl. Also, free (Trojan!) condoms are the best kind of condoms. We know you want to kick it with the coeds this summer and beyond, so we're giving away 1-year supply of condoms and Trojan's BRAND NEW line of lube.
You could be committing one (or all) of three cardinal mistakes, but if that is the unfortunate case, don't worry.
You might tell your best friend about the weird guy you hooked up with last weekend who had an extraordinarily veiny penis (graphic, strange, yet totally conversational), but would you tell her that you're heading to the drugstore later to pick up some trusty lube (not graphic, not strange, yet totally embarrassing)?
I was semi-convinced I was going to die un-penetrated and unappreciated. And then I ran into the welcoming/terrifying arms of online dating and those fears became a distant memory.
They say we learn something new everyday, and if anyone wants to refute me, well I certainly am going to teach you something new today. Let's talk about kissing.
I can understand withholding sex if you're trying to weed out people who are interested in getting to know you as a person rather than just trying to get to know your vagina. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people who out there who misrepresent their intentions and pretend they want to pursue something serious when that's not the case at all.
I was brunching with some ladies the other day, and naturally the conversation turned to guys and sex. Unfortunately, some of the girls have been experiencing some really bad sexual juju.
Night after night, no matter how hard Mr. Mower tried to get Mrs. Mower to have sex with him, she shut him down. He even researched online about how doing housework can turn a woman on.
The possibility of getting a "happy ending" from one of these good-looking massage guys was a goal of one woman, and she decided to share her experiences for everyone to...enjoy.
I feel like if a guy is telling me he's not interested, but can still be sold on sex, I should probably just accept that he's "not that into it" instead of telling myself he's just scared of commitment or is putting up walls.
Do you guys ever wonder why we kiss? Like, what is it about human nature that drives us to go lip-to-lip with another person? French kissing, deep kissing, pecks, magical kissing, etc. We want ALL the kisses!
Sick of the same old routine when it comes to bedroom shenanigans? Tired of not getting that orgasm we all deserve? Or just wanting to spice it up with some new sex positions? From easy to advanced, there's a position for you.
I can only spend so much time alternating between making eye contact with my boyfriend and staring at his business before I start to get kind of bored. So I've come up with a few ways to subtly stymie any boredom that may crop up.
If you like it snipped into your boyfriend's initial, that's a little weird, but sure, that's your choice.
A girl is supposed to be able to have relationships and partners, but not too many. She's supposed to be pure, but not overly pure.
Last week, I had my first vaguely erotic dream in quite awhile. The tension and the chemistry was ridiculous with whoever the guy was...and then my conscience creeped in and reminded me I have a real-life boyfriend and I woke up. Weak.