It’s a Twihard-Knock Life

WTF? So you can sleep with Edward??

When I was waiting outside of the Scholastic store in Soho to buy the 7th Harry Potter book, I saw a reporter from the New York Post who was walking up and down the massive line and interviewing people for a story about the book’s release. I overheard him speaking with one guy who had a lightning bolt scar on his head.

I know what you’re thinking—“All right, it’s kind of odd that an adult man would dress up for the release of a kid’s book, but it’s not totally unheard of. That dude probably wasn’t any weirder than any of the other people in the line.”

Wrong. This nutbar didn’t just draw a lightning bolt on his forehead—as he told the reporter, he had literally carved the scar into his skin with a razor blade.

And to make matters worse, I was ahead of him in line. Yes, I had arrived at the bookstore before the psycho.

So needless to say, I know a thing or two about what happens when fandom gets extreme. Even so, Twihards—people who are obsessed with the Twilight books and movies—take things a step beyond anything I’ve ever seen before. As of Wednesday, at least 2,100 screenings of New Moon, the second movie in the series, were sold out—and those are only the showings measured by MovieTickets.com. There’s also a ton of Twilight merchandise available all over the web, stuff that ranges from normal (t-shirts, posters) to full-on batsh*t crazy (A shower curtain screen-printed with a giant picture of Robert Pattinson’s face. A life size vinyl wall decal of Edward Cullen’s silhouette, accented by the words “Be Safe.” A pair of underwear that’s illustrated with the sexy vamp’s face—inside the crotch). Read More »

Candy Dish: Mario Lopez Wears Ladies Lingerie

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…and he looks good!

Alicia Keys talks about Lil Mama.

Cheap wine pairings for the food you’re really eating.

Get 20% off on Felix Rey’s beautiful bags!

Mischa Barton’s lookin’ healthy!

Sneak peak at the new Harry Potter theme park!

Candy Dish: Welcome Back, Hot-lanta Housewives!

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OMG, we can’t wait for some more NeNe dramz.

The worst swimsuits of the summer.

Yay! Michael Cera is single.

We’re in love with chunky chain necklaces. LOVE.

Lady Gaga shows her nip nips.

Is Cornell the real-world Hogwarts?

Quidditch: Coming to a Campus Near You

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Clearly the fact that there have been six Harry Potter movies released, (two more in the making) seven books out in stores, and an upcoming theme park in Orlando, doesn’t quite express the extent of society’s obsession with the magic wizardly world. Because college Quidditch (yes, the broomstick-riding sport) is on the rise.

With over 200 colleges expressing their interest in the sport, including Princeton, U-Mass-Amherst and Vassar College, Quidditch is spreading like wildfire. It even has its own site, (for all you nerds out there) where you can have access to the latest Quidditch news and history of the sport.

Similar to soccer, the players try and get the ball, or Quaffle that is, into the opposing goal, except they try and do so while riding around on a broomstick…on the ground. Read More »

Life After College: Navigating Life On My Own

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This past Saturday I did what every 20-something girl does on the weekend: I took myself to see Harry Potter. Alone. I was dying to see the movie and no one would go with me so I took my first step on my path to becoming a cat lady and went to see it by myself.

I spent ten minutes debating whether getting food would make me look like a liberated woman without a care in the world or a pathetic loser who not only sees movies alone but also dines alone. In the end I went with no food because I really can’t justify a ten dollar popcorn, even if it does come with free Raisinets (there’s a reason they have to give these away for free). Also, if I got a drink there would be no one to save my seat while I went to the bathroom. Read More »

Overheard: Big Piece of Lame

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Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus. Join the Overheard revolution!Leave your own overheard convos in the comments or send ‘em over!

(Girl, pointing at a grocery store bike rack.)

Girl: That bike doesn’t like me. I tried to get away, but it gave me a serious coochie bruise.

(Best Buy employees, talking to each other at the end of an aisle.)

Employee 1: So I got home, and I was hungry, so I ate some chicken and a pear. I was still hungry, so I ate a plum. And then I was still hungry after that, so I had another bowl of cereal and an apple! And a sandwich! I mean, what? What?

Employee 2: Life’s like that.

(Girl, talking to a crowd of friends.)

Girl: Does anyone else want to go see Harry Potter alone tonight? Read More »

Body of Lies: Keep The Clothes On, Dudes

Some people were just meant to be naked.  They worked hard on their bodies (or were blessed by some freak chance of natural awesomeness) and I won’t stand in their way of presenting perfection to the world.  Hell, I always say that if I had the goods, I’d be showing ‘em off, too.  However, there’s a reason I’m not showing my “goods” to anyone.  Some people just look better with clothes ON.  Like me.  And these dudes:

Leonardo DiCaprio.

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The man is smoldering on the red carpet…and pretty much everywhere else you find him with clothes on.  However, the beach (and we’re not talking the movie)?  Leo is a bit heavy on the man boobs and whatnot.  He should stick to the jeans + tee shirt rule at the very least. Read More »

The Weekly Wrap Up: Let’s Get Magical

tired_baby-whew.jpgThis week was pretty rad, what with so much geek flying all over the place.  The new Harry Potter movie is out and I’m extremely excited (I may not be the only one).  I’m almost to the point where I want to don a cape, grab a wand and do my best English accent (best = horrific).  Instead of going out to buy a brand new cape, I’ll stick with what I have in my closet…and that’s leggings.  Luckily, they go with everything.  Even capes.

Crocs, however, go with nothing and I’m happy to see they’re dying a quick death.  What will we do, now that Crocs are dying and we have space in our closet for more fabulous accessories?  Well, get a vagina wig, of course!  Those things are incredible.  I’m even considering getting one specially made (complete with sequins and bright pink faux fur) for the College Candy party later this month.  We’ll see…

As excited as I am about the fabulousness that will be the College Candy party, I’m nervous about bringing a date.  Every time I start seeing a guy, I get all tangled up in cryptic text messages.  And that stupid (GLORIOUS) book/movie, He’s Just Not That Into You, has apparently ruined me for life, so even if I had hope before, I’ll talk myself out of it now.  Maybe some well-timed Harry Potter pick-up lines can save me!  Or, in the case of Jessica Simpson, maybe not.

Maybe I should just give up sex entirely and take a platonic guy bestie.  Then I can use him as a wing man/drink server.  You never know when a guy friend can turn into a boyfriend.  Either way, I’ll have a good time!

Celebretard Showdown (Magical Edition!): Daniel Radcliffe vs. Robert Pattinson

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The newest installment in the Harry Potter series came out this week and so did my inner (well, mostly inner…sometimes outer) geek.  My friend Google helped me satisfy some of my more nerdy urges to gaze upon the faces of my favorite wizards (past and present).  That’s when I was reminded that Robert Pattinson was in Harry Potter once-upon-a-time.

After spending some time re-watching The Goblet of Fire and considering a double feature with Twilight, I started thinking of the similarities between Daniel Radcliffe and Robert Pattinson.  As much as I love those two, sometimes they can get annoying.  And pale.  Why are they so pale??  So, for a special magical edition of Celebretard Showdown, we have a wizard and a vampire.  Giggity. Read More »

Candy Dish: Man Dies For Madonna

madonna tour

Man killed when a Madonna set collapses.

Need a Harry Potter refresher before seeing the latest?

Lindsay Lohan’s career is really in the crapper now.

You may want to wear a body condom on the ferris wheel.

This sounds like some quality programming.

Animals on water skis!